“The cancer has spread
and there’s nothing
we can do.”

I lost my last twenty
on the walk to the El that was meant to
either get me somewhere or
get me some beer
so I guess the universe
has a sense of humor but
a keen hand as well.
I’m processing  a quarter century
of unvented heartbreak
and not checking my texts.
I really do wish you well.

I wish you quiet hell;
insidious cramps, your abdomen with canines
eating itself.
I wish it in white, I wish it
in black, I wish it in public,
I wish it suddenly.
I wish you false pregnancy tests.
I wish you the cohosh and the courage
to change it.
I wish you rabid corners and no
safer way to get downtown,
rain the entire way there.
I wish you one hundred dollars
and a drive thru liquor store,
my loose recovery
and a really bad year.
I wish you Florida in August
and the hurricane that floods.
I wish you Minneapolis in February
and a broken down truck,
no signal to call,
and no salt on the road,
and no one else dumb enough
to risk it.
I wish you anywhere in the world,
and you as a little girl,
to know
packing a cunt
is the curse itself.
I found $3.75 in the
lining of my jacket
and a corner bar and,

I really wish you were here.

“Philadelphia pt 2”


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