Last night, I finished
what I started last February.
Some rituals last a lifetime
so I know I’m lying to myself.
We were in a field full of vibrancy
and living lines.
Alyssums, violets, roses
everywhere.
Finally, color, and
my whole heart broken wide,
stretched the whole equator,
golden, unflappable,
malleable,
an infinity sign.
I said, “this is Elysium;
that’s one word for heaven,
one version, and
there are many others.
You are one, and I will
find and name them all.”
My soul turned from us
to find my beloved honeysuckle and
first dead dog,
Pepper,
my nana, and my
first dead brother.
But first, a bee on my lobe.
I did wear white.
I wore something else too.
Listening, I asked,

“Do you know the difference between me and a crusade?”

You said nothing.
You had a war about you.

“Nothing.”

–Responses from God during meditation, March 13, 11:32 pm

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